Simple And Not

by Greg Segal

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1.
The Words a) Simple and Not Simple and not Knowledge and regret Never meant to hurt Never meant to hurt Never What else was there to do It seemed so simple It was not The answers made sense They did not Never meant to Never meant to Never b)Nursery Rhyme Layabout, layabout, why don't you rise Go outside and look out at the skies The only thing that feels good is nothing Layabout, layabout, how will you work, Pay your bills, eat, have a job and don't shirk The only thing that feels good is nothing Layabout, layabout, sleeping all day, You're not getting younger, time's slipping away You can't coast forever off everyone else The only thing that feels good is nothing Layabout, layabout, why won't you rise, Respond to my volume, respond to my cries.... Functional Impossibilities Functional impossibilities Exist nonetheless New ones come Each go at some point While others somehow continue

about

Simple And Not

This is one piece music, with the following sections:

The Words
a) Simple and Not
b)Nursery Rhyme

Arrangements

Broken, Unhealed

Memories

Room, No Occupant

Layabout's Last Dream:
This is from the point of view of the suicide. The daze, the ambulance ride, the last breaths, and any sort of consciousness after- that last part is left to your interpretation.

Functional Impossibilities


"Simple and Not" could not have been written at another time in my life. I understood things from one side only; now, as a parent, the sadness and horror of a child's suicide is much clearer to me. I had sympathy for the parent's feelings before having kids; and in fact, during the time in my life where I was much like the "layabout" character of this suite, it was primarily how my death would affect my parents and siblings that stopped me from voluntarily sliding off the earth. Still, I could not know what a parent's concern for a child's future felt like, I could not know the pressure of feeling responsible for motivating and guiding and even giving tough love when it appeared necessary for their well-being. I could only see my own disgust with the world I was expected to get along in, my sense of their having given in and given up, and their expectation, however well intended, that I do the same. One of the reasons I waited so long to have children was this: how do you sell them a way of life you despise? How do you help them along without poisoning them with your own cynicism? There was no easy answer before, there is no easy answer now. I only know that mistakes in judgment can have catastrophic effects. The only answer I have ever seen for this is love. Maybe tempered with patience. I am not a fan of tragedy, and this was only written because it entered my head and refused to go away until I dealt with it this way. May you and I and our loved ones never have to deal with this in real life.

GS, October 2016

credits

released October 19, 2016

All sounds performed and organized by Greg Segal
Recorded July to October, 2016
Instruments:
Vocals, virtual instruments with keyboard
controller (synths and 'Trons, mostly),
cello, violin, electric guitar, electric bass,
recorder, drums, percussion, homemades

Cover: GS, using public domain Klein Bottle illustration

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Greg Segal Portland, Oregon

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